"Reducing Fears"
Whether worries about Covid-19 keep you riveted to breaking news or whether your main concern is that cancer might return, the first step to take is to accept your fears. Don’t try to suppress them; living in denial is counterproductive. Face your fears. Then decide you will get through this since you’ve been fearful before and chose to overcome. Knowing you can come out the other side, so to speak, will begin to calm your racing thoughts.
Next, after making a decision that you will not succumb to fear, you need to get your body into action! Hopefully, you can take a long walk or go to the gym. If this isn’t practical, at least do some exercise. Even the simple action of concentrating on breathing is helpful. You don’t need to follow strict guidelines on breathing exercises, just concentrate on evenly breathing in and out. Get up and get a drink of water or any action which will serve to refocus your mind away from a cycle of fear and hopelessness.
On the subject of water…be sure to stay hydrated. Dehydration can cause anxiety to increase. It can cause heart palpitations which in turn can make you think you are having a heart attack. Another way to slow down is to have a relaxing bath. Since lavender oil is known for its calming properties, apply a couple drops if you began to become anxious.
If you find you are feeling overwhelmed, bring yourself back to the present. Instead of thinking about future worse-case scenarios, ask yourself questions. Am I safe? Should I do something right now? This brief moment of mindfulness will help. Another suggestion is to pause and mentally count a few things you see and sounds you hear. Then count as you touch several objects. This technique can slow down panicked thoughts.
Instead of letting Snopes do the fact-checking for you, ask yourself if the worst-cast scenario you are imagining is rational. Learn to train your thoughts by questioning them. Either self-analyze or ask a close friend to listen to your concerns to gauge if they are valid. Often simply venting to another person who knows what you’re going through is therapeutic. Also, when you are forced to confront a specific fear by saying it or writing it down, you may realize it is unreasonable. However, if you are experiencing an actual problem, then make a plan of action. By beginning to act upon a solution, stress will be lessened.
Another helpful strategy is to distance yourself from TV and social media. Many reports are slanted or overly pessimistic and can induce feelings of despair. For example, since fear sells, news outlets may want to capture readers with extreme headlines. The day I was writing this, a TV news broadcast was caught showing videos of a serious medical situation caused by Covid-19 in Italy, claiming the video was of New York. Unplug and plug into real life!
Looking beyond oneself is a definite way to reduce fears. Find something purposeful to do. Did you always want to try a certain recipe? Do you have time for an enjoyable craft or project? Then could you share your recipe or project with others? If you can find ways to help others, you won’t have time to dwell on negative situations.
The most effective and long-term strategy involves a mindset shift. Come to terms with the truth that life is full of uncertainty. If you accept that life is both imperfect and unpredictable, you will be able to work through your need for certainty. This mindset will enable you to experience less stress, overall. It is possible to eradicate a victim mindset if you work on how you react to circumstances, rather than dwelling on the problem, itself.
If you understand that conquering fear begins with your decision to overcome, you will be in control of your thoughts. At this point, it is important to surround yourself with people who won’t sabotage your new mindset. If people around you echo your previously held pointless mantra of “This is too hard; I can’t do this,” the wheels of your motivation cart will be loosened before you even get rolling.
Finally, and in my opinion, most importantly, tap into your core values. If you haven’t taken time to determine what these are, begin to do so. As Mahatma Gandhi understood, what you believe impacts first your thoughts, then your words, then your actions. “Your actions become your habits. Your habits become your values. Your values become your destiny.” You may want to reexamine your central beliefs if you are often anxious and fearful.
You could seek help by connecting with spiritual leaders who can offer wisdom. Also, you could find renewed positivity by reading an inspirational book. As a Christian, I rely on comforting assurances in the Bible. Isaiah 41:10—“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Reflection:
1. Try listing specific fears you have. Are any of them reasonable? If so, make a plan to solve each individual problem, one at a time. If not, a vague feeling of dread should not have power over you.
2. What are your first thoughts each morning? You can be in control of your thoughts if you make a decision to find things to be grateful for and things that are going well.
3. You may be enduring many difficult situations. Can you rephrase those using “however” to find a positive in each? For example: I am being quarantined; however, now I will have time to read.